And for once I was SuperMom

Thursday, November 17, 2011

The Myth of a Flat Belly

Today I would like to speak the truth.

Women were not made to have flat bellies.

It's true. Google it. Or it. Or Jeeves, or whatever. Or God, I'm pretty sure he'd have my back on this one.

I have never had a perfectly flat belly. Even before I had children. Even when I was a vegetarian and running cross country; a thinning combination to be sure.
Even when I breastfed and shrunk and shrunk down to size two my belly still sloped outward instead of going flat as a board. I looked at it in the mirror and thought,
'Oh well, I guess that's sticking around.' Considering the trauma it went through I'm pretty happy that it doesn't look like a three month old deflated balloon.

I just recently saw a montage of before and after photoshop treatment of magazine photos. Everyone's boobs got bigger, waists got smaller, skin got smoother, and suddenly no one had wrinkles or circles under their eyes. This didn't make me angry. Just kind of flaccid. I cognitively know that photoshop is out there turning already beautiful people into impossibly beautiful people, but actually seeing it was just deflating. As an actress with a smattering of zits across her forehead got perfectly clear skin I remember feeling relieved and thinking it was unfair all at the same time. Like, 'oh, the beautiful people have zits too,' and, 'hey, that makes us feel unnecessarily bad about ourselves.'

Because even though I am pretty savvy, even though I am getting more and more comfortable with my body, I had bought it. I somehow believed that they all had clear skin, no bags under their eyes, and amazingly proportioned bodies. Like they were uber-humans that aren't affected by sleepless nights or bad diets.

Norway is voting on legislation that will make a warning label appear on photos that have been retouched. They have already banned ads from Maybelline and Loreal that were considered too retouched.

I guess I am tired of the lies. These actors are being twisted into shapes that don't even exist. Women were not made with flat bellies. Not even the uber athletes that have not an ounce of fat on them (which I don't begrudge them because they worked hard for it), I am sure that when they turn to the side bellies go out instead of straight down.

I guess I'm just asking all those people that are pushing the lies to stop. What's the point anyway? So you make someone look more beautiful than they really are, why is that a good thing? It may inflate their ego, but the rest of us are left wondering why we don't look like that.
Sometimes it makes me want to move to Europe, where the people who actually get famous are talented and not just nice to look at.

I guess I'm savng that if you have a pooch, give it a pat because it belongs there.

1 comment:

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